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The importance of losing
There is a phrase which basketball superstar Michael Jordan said and it holds plenty of meaning in today’s society. He said, “I am a success today because I’ve failed many times in the past”. How appropriate a sentence especially when we are living in a society which is still relatively failure intolerant. I’ve decided to elaborate more about this topic as it’s always ideal to cultivate certain habits in a child, and dealing with failures and mistakes is definitely one of them. It is a fact that nobody likes to lose; everybody wants to be a winner, kids included. To be on the winning side is fantastic. However, we must be practical and realized that it is definitely impossible to keep winning all the time. When a child made a mistake, it is only normal that the parents stepped in and point out the mistake. Very often, the tone and manner of the parent is extremely important. Too harsh or negative a tone will in the long term, result in the child being too afraid to attempt anything. He has so much fear of being reprimanded that he may become withdrawn, and could end up having a phobia of trying. He may also tend to feel that everyone is watching his actions and he is subjected to their opinions and judgements. Hence, it is highly crucial that the parents do their part in nurturing the young ones. One important part of the process is to let them understand that it is alright to commit a mistake. Depending on the mistake made, not all require a huge dressing down from the parent. The parents must let the child learn and understand from his or her failures. A child likes to explore many things, and instead of the parent focusing on the consequences of failure, one possible way is just to sit back and let the child try it. The parent could then step in and do some explanations, corrections and encouragements too. Of cause, there must be a nice compromise between failure and success. Put it this way, a child who fails all the way probably will require a lot of effort to succeed, and a child who succeed all the time will only require a single failure to shatter him to pieces. Protecting your child from both successes and failures are important. There is one universal tip though – always strive to educate and bring up your child in the most optimistic and positive manner. By achieving this, you will motivate your child to perform even better the next time, and also build up his self confidence. Supportive parents are the precursors to all high performance kids and countless research has supported this findings.
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Contributor's Note
this article was first published on Qassia and will be part of www.mylittlesunshine.sg! This is a site that provides parenting tips, and other related functions for the Singapore Child!
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Congratulations on an excellent article. This kind of stuff should be taught in schools. In fact, the irrational way people treat their children is probably why so many people grow up to be rude and antisocial. (I am thinking that a "parenting license" might be a good idea. Actually, I'm surprised the concept hasn't been introduced in S'pore.  )
 | | nick Jul 8, 2008 10:15 | |
CONTRIBUTOR'S REPLY
Hi Nick Thanks for your compliments. And I agree with you that it has not been implemented in Spore. Sad to say, we are quite far from achieving it. But still, I wish for something similar to my article to be carried out in full force! :)
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